During my program's group trip to Russia, we sat around and looked inward a lot. And we all wonder if we've changed, we say how much we love our friends at home, we appreciate life in the U.S. and we understand the U.S.'s place in the world much better.

I have to say that Denmark itself hasn't drastically changed how I see the world. I have gained the perspective of this new culture, but I probably won't really understand what I've absorbed until I get back to the U.S. My greatest perspective shift may come not from studying abroad but from travelling. Seeing countries where everything doesn't work. Places like France and Italy are not poverty-stricken, but they are not crisp fairy tales like Denmark. And Russia. It was a shock to realize that the mafia controls Russia. That their currency may be worth nothing at any moment. That the old people begging in the subways are not victims of mental illness or familial neglect but of their own government. That churches weren't intended for worship but as memorials to war victories and assassinations.

We read in newspapers how Russia is doing this, and Russia is doing that, to the Chechens and to the diplomats and to their space station. But when do we read about what Russia is doing to itself? A thick layer of dirt covers everything in St. Petersburg. Elderly women stand in subway stops selling three lemons. Walk through a tourist market and soft voices beg you to look at their stands. Children with outstretched hands approach and say only, please. I'm not knowledgable enough to declare that the country is in shambles. But I'm saying that I saw Russia as a world power. And instead it's a place with the wealthy controlling a black market and the government restoring the amber panels in the czars' summer palace while kids go homeless and the university rots.

The subway system is spotless and efficient. The churches and palaces are breathtaking. Every building is enormous. (In my hotel in St. Petersburg, for example, it took me five minutes just to walk to the elevator. People jogged through the halls to save time.) But I never imagined that this well-managed grandeur could exist in a country that simply does not work well. Where if you payed your taxes, you'd be giving away 90 percent of your income. How do we take this country seriously, as a world player? How do we take seriously that such-and-such was decided by the Kremlin, when Putin is just a former mediocre spy in the KGB?

I'm sure Russia's problems aren't the world's worst. And people say they are happier now. They're happier because they can practice their own religions and say what they want to and don't have to be afraid of someone knocking on their door in the middle of the night. And the rest of the world knows that it's better, without Communism. But does the rest of the world think that everything's fine now that capitalism has come? Communism provided stability, a job and a paycheck and a certain tomorrow. And then the leap towards a social democracy fell short. Was anyone watching? Does anyone know?

4/17/2001 12:44:14 PM

 more: archives